I remember like it was yesterday.
A special day was approaching and I couldn’t wait.
This day would change everything for me.
In fact, I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
These thoughts would haunt me like it were a nightmare.
But I knew when this day came it would be like the prison guard had come and opened the door to my one bunk man cell and said…
“You’re free to go”.
This was it…
October 6 2007
The day I became a man.
Or at least I thought so.
It was my 18th birthday and all I could think about before then was the things I could do.
I heard that when you are 18 you are now legally an adult.
That means you can make your own decisions and go wherever you wanted.
Man, all I really wanted was freedom from my mother.
I wanted to go out with my friends, hang out, explore the wild terrains every boy dreams about growing up.
But what I really wanted most was respect from my mom…
the respect from a mother that she could trust her own son to make the right decisions when I go out.
Instead I had a fear driven mother who’s frame of reference for safety was to shelter me from certain environments…
it really felt like everything though.
I mean what do you expect when you have older siblings that leave a bad taste in her mouth.
So she now does everything everything in her power (to the extreme if you ask me) in order to keep me from ending up killed or in jail.
Nothing like that happened though, but hey I did say her thoughts were extreme.
But you know what hindering someone who wants see what the world has in store for him does to a person…
It makes him go mad, frustrated, and a little crazy.
I wanted to get out and leave my mother’s house and live on my own with every fiber of my being.
Then it hit me, I had one idea, one plan to solve my madness…
To run away…
far far away.
The only problem was I didn’t know how.
(Can you imagine an 18 year old still thinking of running away smh)
The only thing I could think of closely related to running away was going away for college.
So this was it, I was hell bent on leaving the state or at least the city to get a taste of freedom.
Lucky enough this led me to a college in Atlanta all the way from Miami Florida.
But as I arrived and was left alone on campus with no mother no family or friends for guidance I realized something else.
I was crippled, and no I just don’t mean by my school loans but that played a major role.
I was not crippled physically but mentally.
I had no idea what to do.
Simple questions such as how do I cook, what do I eat, how do you wash clothes?
I did not know how to navigate through just the basic necessities of life.
I was scared, I felt dumb, and worst of all I still felt like a child.
Who am I to claim to be a man when I can’t even walk down the street without asking mommy for permission.
Eventually I was so frustrated with the disappointment of myself that I started researching and learning how to handle specific daily tasks.
But I discovered something else that hindered my growth and independence.
Huh, go figure.
Just another thing to add to your needs for the basics of life…
Food, shelter, and water.
Again I was stuck and had to figure out a way since I had no experience or guidance in the class of Life 101.
Sad to say that it hit me quite some years afterwards to get to financial independency, but I realized something as I kept getting older.
The more things I wanted or needed required some form of payment.
It seemed the majority of my problems came from the lack of funds.
Therefore I had to switch directions again and luckily I learned from my college years if I want something…
I have to do it myself.
I did my research, and after much studying I had received my reward with a job in web development.
I made it.
I now had a “real job” that paid well and could actually support me independently.
I felt like I was finally a man!!!
Looking back though I wish I had planned out my escape out a little more…
but I’m here now and I learned from my very very expensive experience.
Through it all my experience has taught me to be the person I am today and is my guiding force to what I do now.
For I know the pain of learning the hard way the things life demands of you and the worst feeling is being unprepared.
My past ignorance has taught me many things and I now want to create a bridge for others who may be like me and want a better chance at this thing called life.
That is why I believe learning how to code is so important because it taught me more than just a skill.
It showed me who I was and the things I am capable of.
I want to be able to share that with others.
Now forming a business around this concept is sort of a mission for me.
Change in one person’s life can make the world of a difference…
I know it did for me.
